8 Things Guys Secretly Love

Reading Notes :  8 Things Guys Secretly Love , Author : James Sama

1. Laying your head on his chest.
Men enjoy feeling as though we are being protective. By laying your head on his chest, this signifies that you feel safe in his arms.

2. When you text him first.
There’s a lot of pressure on guys to be the conversation initiator. However, sometimes he might not know if he’s being too pushy or texting you too much.

Guys like to feel attention too! So sending him a quick text will let him know that you’re thinking about him. It’s going to brighten his day and spark a good conversation.

3. When you tell him that you appreciate him.
Although a man should be able to read your feelings from your actions, some guys need a more direct approach. So, tell him how much you value his effort in the relationship.

4. Play with his hair while he’s driving.
I didn’t realize how great this was until a woman I was dating did it to me one day. Reach over and lightly scratch the back of his head. It’s guaranteed to make him smile. But of course, don’t distract him too much while he’s driving

5. Brag about them in public.
If he does something special, like an impromptu dinner he arranged for the two of you, then snap a photo of the tablescape and share it. It’s going to show him that you appreciate him and are willing to share your appreciation with the world.

Now, some people can go overboard with this so be humbly appreciative and respectful of others.

6. Really,really listen.
Women know better than anyone, that really listening isn’t just a passive activity. When you sit down together, keep his eye contact, and genuinely engaged in the conversation. It effectively shows how much you care.

7. Text him when you’re out with your friends.
This is, of course, assuming that you have a guy who is mature enough to understand your need to go out with your friends. So when you are out, text him now and then just saying hello. It’ll make him smile and let him know that you’re thinking about him even when he’s not around.

8. Be affectionate.
You don’t have to jump all over him in public, but small things like taking his hand while you’re walking make a big difference. You can also hug him in line at the grocery store, hook your arm into his when you’re walking down the street, or give him a peck on the cheek while waiting for the movie to start.

Little things go a long way, and paying a little extra attention to how much you value him is going to make the guy in your life feel extra special.

How to increase the ‘love hormone’ in your body

Oxytocin is a hormone produced primarily in the hypothalamus and acts as a neurotransmitter in the brain. It plays a huge role in the female reproduction system during child birth and with lactation. But, the hormone is best known as the “love hormone” because of how it increases with touch and stimulation. This powerful hormone plays a huge role in relationships and how we partner up with others.

HERE ARE WAYS TO INCREASE OXYTOCIN LEVELS IN YOUR BODY:

1. PHYSICAL TOUCH.
Hugs, kisses, and cuddling increase oxytocin levels quickly. As per WebMd a research on oxytocin and how men react to sex showed that under the influence of oxytocin, two areas of the brain responsible for feelings of reward and pleasure lit up when men saw their partner’s faces. But the sight of other women had the opposite effect, suppressing feelings of pleasure. Oxytocin triggers a reward system that activates and releases when we are in loving relationships. Physical touch is stimulating. Oxytocin is released when you have an orgasm and for men it is only released when it is with someone they love.

2. WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT.
When we hear a compliment we feel good about ourselves. We believe we are being loved and held in high esteem. Oxytocin works on this level as well. The “feel good” hormone increases when we are caring and compassionate with another, or vice versa. Words have a powerful frequency. When we feel loved and we relate to it oxytocin increases. The same goes to giving a compliment to another. The kindness you put out into the world also increases oxytocin.

3. LISTEN.
Everyone wants to feel acknowledged. We all want to know that we are being heard and accepted. Listening is an amazing way to increase oxytocin. When you are present with another you can feel the connection. Listen attentively. Put the phone down. Close the computer. Make time to be one-on-one with another. You will find a sense of reward that is priceless. Also, listening to music or something we enjoy releases dosages of the little hormone as well.

4. SMILE AND LAUGH.
Have you observed how kids play? They smile and laugh a lot. Whenever they are in that moment, they are releasing oxytocin. Smiling is contagious. It’s one of those things that you cannot help but return to another when it is geared at you. Research has shown that laughter and smiling improve health through many physiological changes. Most of the time it happens unconsciously. Happy people live for joyous moments. Their oxytocin is constantly being released. Laughter creates a sense of joy that is the biggest trade off in life.

5. MEDITATE AND PRAY.
When you are clear-headed and relaxed your hormones are balance. Oxytocin increases when you are not under the fight or flight mode. Prayer and meditation allow the mind to detach from stress. It lowers blood pressure and allows the body to feel balanced. Mind, body and spirit find a way to connect. Make time for it at some point in the day. You can do it for five minutes anywhere.

6. EXERCISE.
Endorphins and oxytocin increase when we exercise. Oxygen travels to the brain and to other parts of our bodies. Exercise is not just for keeping your body in tact and functioning properly. The amount of hormones released to the brain are also beneficial. You don’t have to go to a gym. Walking around the block or doing gentle yoga can bring on these benefits as well.

7. CRY.
Studies have shown that suppressing your emotions lowers oxytocin levels. Withholding your feelings and not dealing with them causes stress and other physical issues in the body. Your emotional state should be imbalanced with your spiritual and physical bodies. The release of tears allows the body to return to a state of calmness as oppose to holding on to anger or frustration.

8. GIVE.
We feel good when we give, volunteer and do for others. Give gifts, give your time, give to charity and give thanks. Gratitude is a huge factor on how we feel. Give of yourself and watch how great you will feel. Oxytocin produces the feeling of bonding with others. Giving is a form of human bonding. This is a natural and easy way to increase your oxytocin while helping another.

9. GET CREATIVE.
Creativity helps de-stress the mental mind. While you are creating you aren’t worrying or fearing anything. As you paint, draw, sew, journal, write, play an instrument, or anything that takes you out of a normal routine, you are allowing the good hormones to take over in the brain. Endorphins are released and oxytocin is charged up. Making time to use your talents is imperative to inducing joy.

Source : Power of Positivity

 

A Short Guide to a Happy Life: Anna Quindlen on Work, Joy, and How to Live Rather Than Exist

Sharing with you something which touched my heart! 

Quindlen begins:

I’ve never earned a doctorate, or even a master’s degree. I’m not an ethicist, or a philosopher, or an expert in any particular field… I can’t talk about the economy, or the universe, or academe, as academicians like to call where they work when they’re feeling kind of grand. I’m a novelist. My work is human nature. Real life is really all I know.

Life & Work

Don’t ever confuse the two, your life and your work. That’s what I have to say. The second is only a part of the first. Don’t ever forget what a friend once wrote to Senator Paul Tsongas when the senator had decided not to run for reelection because he’d been diagnosed with cancer: “No man ever said on his deathbed I wish I had spent more time at the office.”

Don’t ever forget the words on a postcard that my father sent me last year: “If you win the rat race, you’re still a rat.”

There are thousands of people out there with the same degree you have; when you get a job, there will be thousands of people doing what you want to do for a living. But you are the only person alive who has sole custody of your life. Your particular life. Your entire life. Not just your life at a desk, or your life on the bus, or in the car, or at the computer. Not just the life of your mind, but the life of your heart. Not just your bank account, but your soul.

On Life, People and Love :

Get a life in which you notice the smell of salt water pushing itself on a breeze over the dunes, a life in which you stop and watch how a red-tailed hawk circles over a pond and a stand of pines. Get a life in which you pay attention to the baby as she scowls with concentration when she tries to pick up a Cheerio with her thumb and first finger.

Turn off your cell phone. Turn off your regular phone, for that matter. Keep still. Be present.

Get a life in which you are not alone. Find people you love, and who love you. And remember that love is not leisure, it is work.

It’s ironic that we forget so often how wonderful life really is. We have more time than ever before to remember it. The men and women of generations past had to work long, long hours to support lots and lots of children in tiny, tiny houses. The women worked in factories and sweatshops and then at home, too, with two bosses, the one who paid them, and the one they were married to, who didn’t. . . . Our jobs take too much out of us and don’t pay enough.

She continues:

Life is made up of moments, small pieces of glittering mica in a long stretch of gray cement. It would be wonderful if they came to us unsummoned, but particularly in lives as busy as the ones most of us lead now, that won’t happen. We have to teach ourselves how to make room for them, to love them, and to live, really live.

This is not a dress rehearsal, and that today is the only guarantee you get.

Source : Story Pick

Notes : Doing epic once a year

Do something epic once a year, something that feels epic to you. Plan it. Make time. Once a year. That’s what, maybe 50-80 in your lifetime?

raam.org

This quote is a masterpiece from one of my favorite blogger Raam Dev.  And this has come at the perfect moment!

Thanks Raam 🙂

Dating tip from India’s Best Motivational Speaker

Here’s a dating tip from India’s best Motivational speaker – Akash Gautam

Identifying the right person to be in a relationship with / marrying is like buying a shoe.

Just because the other person pretends to be CARING (i.e. the Shoe is ONLY comfortable) may not make you feel great about the deal after some time.

Most give in to the Comfort waala point & make the purchase but soon they want a refund because now they realize the Oooops factor frown emoticon.

Do not start dating every person who cares for you or comes near you. YOUR own MIND is weak & this is why you want other people to come & complete YOU.

YOU complete yourself by doing awesome stuff with your own life.

Make your own-self stellar. The best antidote for your Loneliness is MASSIVE awesome action.The best of the shoes will then want to sport your feet & moreover then you can select too for reasons beyond ‘only’ Comfort.

Slightly mean Advice given to a young girl who in these days checking on men to get married to / date. Felt like SHARING with you too.